Friday, 19 December 2008

Identification

Life is weird. No matter how much work you do to 'get there'.......where is there? It is a constant game of running to stand still. Weird things annoy me...

  1. Thing that have to be done over and over. Why should I have to shower? I showered yesterday. Why no matter how many time you do this thing it can never get crossed off your 'to do' list.
  2. I'm not a huge fan of eating. I LOVE LOVE LOVE to cook and feed other people but there are very few things that I really look forward to eating....unfortunately Cheese Danishes from the Harbord Bakery are one of them. Oddly I love to drink.
  3. Dirty fingernails on anyone or long fingernails on men.
  4. People who talk through movies or tv shows, especially if it is to ask what happens next
  5. The sound of teeth grinding
  6. People who complicate things or stand in my way when I am trying to accompish something
  7. People who think farting is really funny and insist on doing it in front of people they barely know......or when I am eating
  8. People who don't walk or shop with any awareness that there are other people there too. Shop the same way you drive, look before merging!
  9. People who don't read and some how think it is funny or cute and proudly announce "I don't like to read" You're an asshole and you are probably a member of another group of people I hate, Stupid People
  10. Disorganization, this is pretty basic and I am a Virgo so really I have an excuse
  11. Bad handwriting

My husband and I have been seeing a marriage councilor. Not cause anything was horribly bad but we had a lot of change very quickly and you mix that with the exhaustion of twins and you have a bad drink that gives you a year long headache. This weeks appointment was all about me for some reason. This makes me uncomfortable for a lot of reasons, the biggest one is that I would really like my husband to take all the blame for our problems....that being said we ended up talking about my identity. The doctors point was that along with becoming a mom my identity has completely changed or is in the middle of changing. All the things that I previously called my own and were part of who I was is now in transition. From my work, to friends, to clothes, to social. But here is the thing......I have come to realize that the only thing that really remains is what annoys me....there are some new ones that involve the mom community but really it is the same things. The hard part of all of this is trying to base a whole life on them when the only other thing I have going for me is the precarious perch of new mom. I am not trying to dramatic, in fact I think this is kinda funny. Today I spent most of the day stomping around, when my husband finally asked me what was wrong I said "Nothing I'm just trying on a new me" I think tomorrows me is a nudist and an opera singing student....

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