No matter how much you love your children and no matter how much you know that the decision to have them was the right one, you still wonder what if...... What if I had taken the other option?? What if I let the fertility issue win and choose just to follow a career path. Would I have been more aggressive in choosing?? More determined on the path? I will never know, maybe I just always knew that I would be a stay at home mommy and that would be my small difference in the world. But is it enough??
I have to admit I am getting antsy. I feel like my 'job' in this life is much bigger than this and I am wasting time. I just keep remembering what Madonna said in her first interview after having Lourdes, her first baby. The interview asked her what she had learned since having a baby. Her answer was that she had learned to surrender. That babies are not to be controlled but enjoyed and to enjoy the moment. This is my current lesson....to surrender and be in the moment. What is your current lesson??